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Niagara on the Lake, Ontario, Canada
My virtue is that I say what I think, my vice that what I think doesn't amount to much.

Wednesday, January 17, 2024

Reverse Gentrification

If the law didn’t apply to me
I would squat in an upper income
suburb in SoCal the same way
Europeans squatted on land not their own.
And after stealing a home
not my own I would bulldoze the entire block to the ground.
Put up a 10-story apartment complex.
Siphon water and electricity
from the entire neighborhood
watching pools go empty,
and gardens wilt.

I would leave them with no choice,
but to move out or rent from me
at a cost equal to half or more
than the average family’s monthly income
while never fixing sewage, or power.
I would,
call the cops on all of them,
for walking their dogs at 11 PM,
for jogging in the middle of the street,
and for wearing yoga pants at 2 pm on a Wednesday afternoon.

Happily,
to boost the local economy,
I would open a pawn shop,
Paycheck loan management center
and liquor store.
While I’m at it,
I could get a 1980’s CIA connection,
traffic drugs on the block,
hand some nickels and dimes
and a glock.
Give them different colored bandanas.
Sit back and watch them tear each other apart.
Use the profit to fund an illegal war in some foreign country
and then call the cops on which ever group gets too big.

But I would never do this,
because it’s already been done to us.

by Ramon Jimenez

(3 Quarks Daily)

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