The Millions offers some baseline definitions for our ever-changing reading world:
Knausgård: To brood incessantly over seemingly trivial matters. (“Jim is in the study with the lights off, Knausgårding about the Celtics game.”)
Wuthering Heights: A method of killing any nascent interest in reading that a high-school student may have.
Go Set a Watchman: To reap an unscrupulous profit from the elderly and infirm. (“Gary sent his rich aunt a get-well card, but he’s just trying to Go Set a Watchman her.”)
Brick-and-Mortar Bookstore: A type of small business so unique and charming that Amazon.com — online purveyors of dishwashers, tube socks, and lice shampoo — is now attempting to make inroads in the market.
Audiobook: A method for allowing John Lithgow to pay the taxes on his second vacation home.
Library Book: A system of delivering old receipts, ancient ketchup stains, and dry, flattened boogers from one patron to the next.
Internet Humorist: A person who overestimates his own propensity for humor, and is grievously enabled by the Internet’s need for cheap, disposable content.
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